An Appropriate Poem For The New Year

I got this from http://www.inspirationpeak.com/cgi-bin/poetry.cgi?record=10 .

These Are My Wishes For You
Sandra Sturtz Hauss

May you find serenity and tranquility in a world you may not always understand.

May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism.

Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone.

May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them.

May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them.

Remember, those whose lives you have touched and who have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished. It is the content of the encounter that is more important than its form.

May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart. Find time in each day to see beauty and love in the world around you.

Realize that what you feel you lack in one regard you may be more than compensated for in another. What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future. May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility. Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience.

May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments.

May you always feel loved.

Goodbyes

This is the day that will end the year 2007. This year will finally say goodbye but where shall it go? Does a year die and journey to a next life just like humans? Or does it just stay in our memories forever? This year has been a year of goodbyes for me.

This is the year I said goodbye to my high school life. I graduated from high school last March.
This is the year I said goodbye to the high school friends, classmates, and batchmates I shared my happiness and sadness with.
This is the year I said goodbye to my high school teachers who imparted a lot of knowledge and wisdom I needed to survive life.
This is the year I said goodbye to my alma mater where I spent 9 years of my life.
This is the year I said goodbye to my family as I leave for Katipunan to study in college.
This is the year I said goodbye to Dagupan and Calasiao where I grew up.
This is the year I said goodbye to curfews, household chores, and parental supervision. (haha. Well, not really.)
This is the year I said goodbye to singlehood and finally gave my heart to a "fried chicken".

With all these goodbyes came all the hellos, too!

This is the year I said hello to my college life.
This is the year I said hello to new friends in college where some of them already hold a special place in my heart. I won't mention their names because they already know who they are. =D
This is the year I said hello to new professors who will make my college experience hard but fruitful in the end.
This is the year I said hello to my new school and new home (hopefully) for the next four years.
This is the year I said hello to my roommates and orgmates whom I consider as my new family.
This is the year I said hello to my dorm where I will live while studying in the Ateneo.
This is the year I said hello to more freedom and less parental supervision. (haha. But then again, not really.)
This is the year I said hello to a relationship that I pray will last for a lifetime if not forever.

*****************

I spent this last day of the year with my Karlo. I'll miss him so much. He will go back to Baguio this January 2 because their classes will resume the next day. This christmas break, we almost saw each other every other day. We went out last December 24, 26, 28 and 31. I so much miss him. *sigh*

*****************

Geez, classes start on January 7. Argh! Back to school, back to hell! Goodbye comfy outfits and hello dress code!

*****************

Blessings I received this year:

January - I passed almost all the college entrance tests I took except for UP.

February - He tied my shoelaces. haha.

He danced with me in our last prom.

March - I graduated from high school (is that really a blessing?)

I received the "perfect attendance" award during graduation. haha.

April - We became closer friends even if he already knew about it.

Precious moments were spent with my high school classmates and

friends.

May - Just like in April.

I started to meet potential friends through the net and some of them

became my blockmates!

June - My college life started. (Is this really considered a blessing? Oh well!)

July - I celebrated my 17th birthday and I gave my heart to Karlo (cheesy?mushy? corny? Who cares? =P haha)

Anna and I went to Baguio

August - I love chocolates! M&Ms, kisses, toblerones, twix, cadbury...

September - Hmm, can't think of something.

October - My first sembreak! Yay!

November - Hmm, I can't also think of something.

December - My first christmas as a college student and with my Karlo.

Unfortunately, this is the first christmas I didn't feel the christmas

spirit at all.

*****************

Have a super happy new year. I hope that 2008 has a lot of good surprises in store for all of us! Enjoy the last day of 2007 and the first day of 2008! Start the year with a prayer! God bless us all!

I Am Super Sad

...why can't chocolates or choco oreo donuts make me happy?
...why did Baguio seem different today?
...why can't I just forget about that girl who wants to steal my Karlo?
...why do I have to go back to Manila?
...why does this holiday season has to end?
...why am I still not used to college life?
...please take me back to high school!
...why can't I have super high grades?
...or why am I just not contented with the passing or so-so grades?
...why am I missing you so much?
...please tell me something comforting!
...why didn't I feel the Christmas spirit this year?
...why does this Christmas break has to end soooo soon?
...why can't I just live my life the way I want it to?
...why can't time just fly so fast and make me graduate already!
...I hate EMOs!
...but why do I feel like one?
...at one point in my life, I wanted this so therefore I do not have the right to complain in the first place!
...stupid me!
...I just want to shout at you "R"rrrr!
...just PLEASE! get lost!
...can someone just please cheer me up?
...it will be my hell week when I get back to the university.
...I'm gonna miss my blockmate, Michi. [take care!]
...happy birthday, dear papa! i love you!
...I'm not that li'l girl who used to be problem-free!
...I will turn 18 in about seven months.
...oh! how wish to go back to my childhood days and just think about dolls and cotton candies!
...life was sweeter back then.
...my life is really complicated right now.
...I don't even know why I'm taking up this course.
...not knowing where to end up in the future.
...kept on telling myself, "I can find a job anywhere." 'coz that's what the upperclassmen and alumni told me.
...it is a minute before nine o'clock in the evening.
...bonsoir!

My Christmas Blog Entry

It has been exactly a month since I last made an entry for my blog. Well, I had been so busy with school work and this is the only free time I have. Yesterday, Karlo fetch me at our house and brought me to their house together with Vinizza, Gabby, and Sev. We ate our lunch there. I also met one of Karlo's blockmates. Hmm, as always time flies soooo fast whenever I'm with him. Parang lagi na lang bitin. It's like I just started hanging out with him then it's time to go back home again. Hayy, long distance relationship is really hard. Parang ayoko na nga umuwi kahapon, tapos nagcomment si Sev...sabi niya "Ano ba yan! Parang adik ka na sa kanya!" I just igonred it. I mean, we don't always get to see each other. Kaya when I get the chance to spend time with him, sinusulit ko talaga. I do not think that is considered being addicted to a person. An example that I could think of when you say "adik sa isang tao" is when everyday na nga kayo magkasama, every day pa kayo magkatext and parang one minute lang kayo hindi magkita, nababaliw ka na. That, for me, is being addicted to a person.

So at around three in the afternoon, Karlo brought me back to our house. My tita, tito, cousins and I went to Quesban to celebrate our christmas there. My tita, tito and I also visited lolo Hilario, my tito's lolo, in the hospital. Even if lolo Hilario is not related to me, I cried when I saw him. He was really weak and he can't celebrate Christmas in their home even if he wanted to.

Anyway, I hope that all of you had a wonderful Christmas this year. =D

A Happily Ever After

For the past week, Karlo and I have not been in good terms. Admittedly, we often fight over small things. I guess it is a normal thing for couples but I am so tired of crying. I am so tired of all the pain which are brought by these frequent quarrels. Though we immediately fix things between us, everything still seems wrong. All of these made me come to the point of thinking about leaving him. Depression has somewhat become my bestfriend for the past week. Nothing---not even chocolate bars or choco oreo donuts can make me happy. I have become so depressed that I disregarded the thought of a "happily-ever-after", thinking that it is just some silly thing Walt Disney came up with---until...

Grace, Anna and I watched the movie Enchanted. It was because of the movie which reminded me of all the beautiful things love has to offer. Though love offers joy, it also comes with pain and hurtful moments at times. It's a package deal, y'know! Love = joy + pain. You can not fall in love and only feel joy and happiness and throw pain in the trash bin. Sorry but love does not work that way. Anyway, it is about a princess [well, not actually] named Giselle who is somewhat teleported to New York. She met Robert who took care of her. Giselle's supposedly prince charming followed her to New York to bring her back to Andalasia [where they came from] and marry her. Prince Charming's mother, the witch, ruined everything when she herself followed them to New York. Robert, a man from the real world, who does not believes in happily-ever-afters and other fairy tale stuff, fell in love with Giselle while Robert's ex-fiancee married Prince Charming in Andalasia. In the end, everyone lived happily ever after.

A lot of the scenes and quotes/lines from the movie made me think about my relationship with Karlo. I know that I had taken him for granted so maaaany times and I feel so guilty about it. I now realized how important Karlo is to me. I know that he loves me so much but I often ignore his feelings. If I want to have a "happily-ever-after", it is all up to me and Karlo [us] to make it happen. Karlo may have done something wrong but I have my own shortcomings, too! I guess it is unfair if I just constantly blame everything to him. So now, I would like to say sorry for everything I have done to you, Karlo. I know I have caused you pain and made you cry for the past week and I really, really regret it. I love you so much. I don't know if you believe me but I do still love you. I hope we will have our own happily ever after in the end. [emo ba?sorry.]

Anyway, this is the lyrics of the song "That's How You Know" by Amy Adams. This song is my favorite song from the movie along with all the other songs included in the movie's soundtrack. Watch Enchanted and I promise no one will get disappointed. Enchanted is now one of my favorite movies.

Lyrics of the song:

Giselle: How does she know you love her?
How does she know she's yours?

Man: How does she know that you love her?

Giselle:How do you show her you love her?

Both: How does she know that you really, really, truely love her?
How does she know that you love her? How do you show her you love her?
How does she know that you really, really, truely love her?

Giselle:It's not enough to take the one you love for granted
You must remind her, or she'll be inclined to say...
"How do I know he loves me?"
(How does she know that you love her? How do you show her you love her?)
"How do I know he's mine?"
(How does she know that you really, really, truely love her?)

Well does he leave a little note to tell you you are on his mind?
Send you yellow flowers when the sky is grey? Heyy!
He'll find a new way to show you, a little bit everyday
That's how you know, that's how you know!
He's your love...

Man: You've got to show her you need her
Don't treat her like a mind reader
Each day do something to need her
To believe you love her

Giselle:Everybody wants to live happily ever after
Everybody wants to know their true love is true...
How do you know he loves you?
(How does she know that you love her? How do you show her you need her?)
How do you know he's yours?
(How does she know that you really, really, truely-)

Well does he take you out dancin' just so he can hold you close?
Dedicate a song with words in
Just for you? Ohhh!

All:He'll find his own way to tell you
With the little things he'll do
That's how you know That's how you know!

Giselle:He's your love He's your love...
That's how you know (la la la la la la la la)
He loves you (la la la la la la la la)
That's how you know (la la la la la la la la)
t's true(la la la la la)

Because he'll wear your favorite color
Just so he can match your eyes
Rent a private picnic
By the fires glow-oohh!

All:His heart will be yours forever
Something everyday will show
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know (That's how you know)
That's how you know!

Giselle:He's your love...

Man: That's how she knows that you love her
That's how you show her you love her

Giselle:That's how you know...That's how you know... He's your love...

Firsts?

Last November 2, my KFC and I went out for the last time before going back to our old lives. That was the first time we spent our monthsary together, the first time we ate lunch in a place more special than Mcdo, the first time he gave me a letter and a lot more. He gave me letters before but this time it's different because he used a colored pen and paper. He usually just e-mails me his letters. This is the greatest gift that Kaloi gave me so far. I love it because this is the first creative gift of Kaloi. He presented the letter in a creative way and he called it the "bomb". I really miss him. As much as I want to share every detail that happened that day, I decided not to. All I can say is... I really had fun. I just love him so much. =D

Uhm----Iyakan Na?

klanglahigfoangbml vbasokhtioyrtionsvlk dnsklzngoaiushgioasnmglkasngoashetuhnwklgv sadklfjaowie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ayoko na! Ayoko na! Hindi ko kilala sarili ko! Hindi ko na kilala mga tao sa paligid ko. I just want to breakdown na lang at umiyak. Akala ko ba masaya ang sembreak? Bakit tumutulo luha ko? Panahon na naman ng pag-iyak. Tuwing sembreak na nga lang kami magkikita, halos hindi pa payagan lumabas. Hindi na naman kami pasaway ah. Alam naman nila lahat ng ginagawa namin pero bakit wala pa rin yung full trust?

Oo na! Ugaw-ugaw nga ako eh. Ang kulit kulit ko. Isip-bata, ganyan! Ang sad. Love mo nga ko diba? Ewan. I'm sorry for not acting like I should be. I am aware that I do not act like a seventeen-year-old person. I don't know. I'm stupid siguro.

Hays, I just want to be with you. Sorry ha? Ang hirap kasi. Gusto lang naman kita makita at makasama kapag pareho tayong nasa Dagupan. Super layo ko kasi. Super bihira ka pang makasama. Hindi ko kasi alam gagawin ko. Loneliness. Ewan ko. Mahirap pero gusto ko. Gusto ko kasi love kita. Mas lalo ako nagmumukhang makulit [at sabik na makita ka?] dahil lagi kita pinipilit na lumabas. Sorry pero yun na nga lang nagpapasaya sa akin eh.

Wala naman kasing nakakaintindi sa sitwasyon ko. Ayoko magreklamo pero parang ganun na nga nangyayari. Ayoko magreklamo kasi it's my choice rin naman na mag-aral sa admu na super layo sa pamilya, mga kaibigan at sa iyo. Kaya kapag nahohomesick ako, bakit ako magrereklamo? Kapag may sakit ako at walang mag-aalaga sa akin, bakit ako magrereklamo? Kapag malungkot ako at walang magpapasaya sa akin, bakit ako magrereklamo? Kapag namimiss kita at gustong makasama ngunit hindi maaari, bakit ako magrereklamo? Choice ko nga ito eh. Pero hindi ko naman maitago yung kalungkutan ko. Marami akong gustong gawin pero hindi naman pwede. Posible pero hindi pwede.

Ayoko na ngang mangulit. Andami kong gusto sabihin pero huwag na lang. Baka may masabi pa akong mali at pagsisihan ko din sa huli. Ang eng*t-eng*t ko talaga. Err! Naiinis na ko sa sarili ko. Ayoko na! Ang hirap iexplain ng nararamdaman ko ngayon. Ang hirap iexplain kung sino ako ngayon at kung bakit ako ganito. At bakit ko nga ba ieexplain? Wala rin namang may pakialam. Sh*t! Ang komplikado ng buhay. Walang nakakaintindi at walang nakakatulong sa akin. Wala----kahit isa-----Wala------kahit isa man lang sa mga taong mahal ko------wala-----wala sa pamilya ko-----------wala-----wala sa mga kaibigan ko-----wala----pati yata ikaw----wala-----pati sarili ko.

What Happened To The 17-year-old Prune Juice?

October 12, 2007

My roomies [Chrissie and Grace] and I went to the Powerplant Mall and shopped. Well, I haven't bought anything from PM except for a chocolate crepe. It's sooo yummy! It was only Chrisse who shopped for clothes and shoes. After PM shopping, we went to Greenhills and guess what we did? Well, uhm----shopped again! Hahaha. This time I bought two blouses, a dress, a necklace with a japanese pendant, silver shoes, and food. Hahaha. Yeah! I love food. Good thing I was able to control myself not to buy a box of Krispy Kremes. We went home after shopping and eating dinner.

October 14, 2007

I went to the college chapel for the send-off mass for the retreatants. After the mass, we [ACLCers retreatants] waited for the bus to bring us to Baguio City. We had our retreat in Mirador Jesuit Villa.

October 15-19, 2007

Silent retreat. Magnum Silencium? No cellphones, no laptops, no iPods/mp3s, no talking, modesty of the eyes and monk walk. Waaaaaaah! I can't believe I survived the five-day retreat! I really wanted to give up because I don't think I can survive without communicating with other people but since God loves me so much......He made ways for me to stay. He gave us the chance to talk when the RD of the common points for wednesday lifted the silence during that time. God also made way to reach out to me when Greg and Kuya Jason gave me letters. At least, I was able to communicate with other people even in just a few minutes. That made me continue with my retreat. I realized that God really answers my prayers. All I have to do was to wait. On the last night of the retreat when the QMs broke the silence, no one slept. Hahaha. Everyone was talking and laughing the whole night. Hmm, we were just enjoying the freedom to talk again. Hahaha. Remember: we didn't talk for five days except for the few minutes of lifting the silence last wednesday.

October 20, 2007

I've been waiting for this day. During my five days in Baguio City, I was feeling sad because everytime I look at everything around me, it reminds me of the times I spent with Kaloi in Baguio City. Yeahp yeahp! The very first time we spent time together was in Baguio. I enjoyed every moment of that. Thanks to Anna Moreno and her family, thanks to Grace and thanks to Kaloi. Anyway, after breakfast I said goodbye to the ACLCers. They were really really kind and kept on asking me if I'll be okay on my own. Hmm, after saying goodbye to them, I went to the new Victory station and since I was too early, I just sat there while waiting for Kaloi and his family. I was really scared and nervous. I didn't know what to do and say when they arrived. I just smiled and said "Good morning po!". They smiled back and asked me how long have I been waiting for them and said maybe an hour but it's okay with me. His mom, dad and sister went to his dorm while Kaloi and I went to SLU to get his grades but SLU will release their grades pa pala on October 23. So, we went to SM na lang and ate lunch with his family. I wasn't talking much except when his family asked me questions. Eeeh! I was so shy and nervous eh. I really don't know what to say. After lunch, his family shopped while Kaloi and I just strolled sa SM. After magshop ng family niya, Kaloi and I went back to the new victory station to get my big bags and brought it to the old victory station. Tapos ayun, we went home na. Basta, I had fun! Thank you to his family and thank you na rin kay Kaloi. =D Thank you sa lunch, sa pamasahe, sa fruits and sa pagbuhat ng bags ko. Thank you might not be enough but really----I'm super super grateful for everything. I love my KFC. On our way home pala, Kaloi called me the 17-year-old prune juice kasi I smelled like prune juice daw! Hahaha! Ang loko talaga nun! Tapos I was wearing a violet-like jacket pa nun kaya sabi niya "Bagay talaga prune juice sayo! Nakaviolet jacket ka pa!" hahaha. Ang loko mo talaga! [kaloi]

Random Things

Top ten things I did yesterday ( 13th of October, 2007):

10. woke up at noon
9. wrote a letter for Chrissie
8. watched HSM 1
7. went to the Ateneo with Grace to pass her physics project
6. met her physics prof
5. went to National bookstore, Cello's, and the supermarket
4. ordered Mongolian Rice Bowl at KFC for take-out
3. watched HSM 2
2. bid Grace goodbye and hugged Chrissie [I'm gonna miss you Chrissie! I hope you'll still be our roommate. Have fun in Connecticut and keep in touch.]
1. text my kisses

Top ten things/persons I miss:

10. my blockmates
9. school? [haha =P]
8. the mall/s
7. gonuts donuts
6. UAAP season
5. bangus city and puto town
4. baguio city
3. my roomies
2. my Kaloi and my HS friends/batchmates
1. my family

*****************

Ooooh! I can't believe the first sem is over.

I just can't explain what I feel about my first sem in the Ateneo.

A lot of things happened in just four/five months.

I admit, it was hard keeping up with the demands of the university but with the help of my roommates I survived the first sem.

Of course, not only my roommates but a lot of people helped me during my first sem.

They are:

my family, Karlo, HS friends and batchmates, block R3, ACLCers and my profs.

Aside from them, God was there and will always be there for me.

I'm just feeling sad because I'm all alone now.

My roomies left me tonight except for Aimee who left last Friday.

I'm so gonna miss my three roomies!

They're simply the best!

Four different people from four different cities placed in one room to live with each other for a semester and turned out to be friends not only for this sem but for life.

Room 407:

Bed A: Aimee

Bed B: Jusz

Bed C: Grace

Bed D: Chrissie

*****************

I soooo miss my Kaloi na!

I want to see him na.

Ooooh. Wala lang.

I miss my Zzy Che na rin. =D

I can't wait to give my gift for her.

I want to go home na!

Retreat.....uhm!

*****************

Ooooh!

I got a B+ in my PE class [soccer].

I think that's my highest grade for the sem.

Too bad it can't pull my grades up because PE grade is not a part of the QPI's computation.

*****************

I can't sleep but I must because I have to wake up early tomorrow.

.zsuj.

Isang Sulat Ng Magulang Para Sa Kanyang Anak

I found this somewhere in the internet and it really made me cry. =C

Sa aking pagtanda, unawain mo sana ako at pagpasensyahan.

Kapag dala ng kalabuan ng mata ay nakabasag ako ng pinggan o nakatapon ng sabaw sa hapag kainan, huwag mo sana akong kagagalitan. Maramdamin ang isang matanda. Nagse-self-pity ako sa tuwing sisigawan mo ako.

Kapag mahina na ang tenga ko at hindi ko maintindihan ang sinasabi mo, huwag mo naman sana akong sabihan ng "binge!" paki-ulit na lang ang sinabi mo o pakisulat na lang. Pasensya ka na, anak. Matanda na talaga ako.

Kapag mahina na tuhod ko,pagtiyagaan mo sana akong tulungang tumayo, katulad ng pag-aalalay ko sa iyo noong nag-aaral ka pa lamang lumakad.

Pagpasensyahan mo sana ako kung ako man ay nagiging makulit at paulit ulit na parang sirang plaka. Basta pakinggan mo na lang ako. Huwag mo sana akong pagtatawanan o pagsasawaang pakinggan. Natatandaan mo anak noong bata ka pa? kapag gusto mo ng lobo,paulit-ulit mo 'yong sasabihin,maghapon kang mangungulit hangga't hindi mo nakukuha ang gusto mo. Pinagtiyagaan ko ang kakulitan mo.

Pagpasensyahan mo na rin sana ang aking amoy. Amoy matanda, amoy lupa. Huwag mo sana akong piliting maligo. Mahina na ang katawan ko. Madaling magkasakit kapag nalamigan, huwag mo sana akong pandirihan. Natatandaan mo noong bata ka pa? pinagtiyagaan kitang habulin sa ilalim ng kama kapag ayaw mong maligo.

Pagpasensyahan mo sana kung madalas,ako'y masungit, dala na marahil ito ng katandaan.Pagtanda mo, maiintindihan mo rin.

Kapag may konti kang panahon,magkwentuhan naman tayo, kahit sandali lang. inip na ako sa bahay, maghapong nag-iisa. Walang kausap. Alam kong busy ka sa trabaho, subalit nais kong malaman mo na sabik na sabik na akong makakwentuhan ka, kahit alam kong hindi ka interesado sa mga kwento ko.Natatandaan mo anak, noong bata ka pa? Pinagtiyagaan kong pakinggan at intindihin ang pautal-utal mong kwento tungkol sa iyong teddy bear.

At kapag dumating ang sandali na ako'y magkakasakit at maratay sa banig ng karamdaman, huwag mo sana akong pagsawaan alagaan. Pagpasensyahan mo na sana kung ako man ay maihi o madumi sa higaan,pagtiyagaan mo sana akong alagaan sa mga huling sandali ng aking buhay. Tutal hindi na naman ako magtatagal.

Kapag dumating ang sandali ng aking pagpanaw, hawakan mo sana ang aking kamay at bigyan mo ako ng lakas ng loob na harapin ang kamatayan.

At huwag kang mag-alala, kapag kaharap ko na ang Diyos na lumikha, ibubulong ko sa kanya na pagapalain ka sana ... dahil naging mapagmahal kasa iyong ama't ina...

Let us learn to appreciate and be grateful to our parents and grandparents. Always love them and try to understand them even if we don't get along with them sometimes.

WE definitely bleed BLUE

I have blue blood running through my veins.

After all the trials we've been through like going to school at 9 pm (thursday) to line up for the selling of tickets the next day but ended up getting a GA ticket and going to Araneta at 7 am at the day of the game itself to buy an upper box ticket----it is ALL worth it.

You could really feel the school spirit in the big dome.

The blue babble was just behind us and I felt like my heart and the drums beat as one.

I wasn't able to watch the first ateneo-lasalle game in araneta but it's okay.

The second game was just as fun as the first one.

The outcome of any admu-dlsu game is never predictable.

Chris is, without a doubt, TIUperman.

I felt really bad when the score was 38-51 but then we caught up soon enough.

I can't stop cheering out loud and jumping up and down because the game was so intense.

Almost no one in Araneta was sitting down during the game.

Almost everyone was wild and cheering for their own team.

The big dome is full of people wearing only blue or green.

Maybe only a hundred people wore a different color of shirt aside from blue/green.

I was super tired after the game but really happy.

Here are pics taken after the game:

One Big Fight!

Go ATENEO!

Ang Sarap Maging Atenista

Bakit nga ba?

-dahil maraming freebies
-dahil ang mga atenista ay men and women for and with others
-dahil masarap kumain sa Manang's
-dahil may mga kaibigan akong gaya nila Grace, Anna, Aimee, Chrissie at marami pang iba
-dahil maganda ang campus
-dahil ang daming pwedeng kainan sa may Katipunan
-dahil maganda ang LRT station sa Katipunan
-dahil maraming cute at hotties sa blue school
-dahil cool si Dean Ang
-dahil ang daming walang pasok noong Agosto
-dahil kasali ako sa ACLC at mababait mga tao doon

Ngunit kahit masarap maging atenista, nahihirapan pa rin ako... at bakit kaya?

-dahil kahit anong aral ang gawin ko 1.86 lang ang aking QPI sa advisory mark
-dahil naka C lang ako sa Filipino at ES Lec at D naman sa ES Lab
-dahil bagsak ako sa PE practical exam
-dahil ang gastos tumira dito sa Katips
-dahil ang layo ko sa aming home sweet home
-dahil nasa Baguio ang aking kisses
-dahil hindi ko kasama ang aking Zzy
-dahil tumataba na ako
-dahil yung Easy A daw na natsci ay mahirap din pala
-dahil dalawa ang basic subjects ko
-dahil ang tagal ng sembreak
-dahil hindi ko alam kung gagraduate ba ako sa unibersidad na ito o magpapaalam lang ba pagktapos ng isang taon?
-dahil hindi ko na yata matutupad ang aking pangarap na maging DL at makasama sa JTA

Ang tanging pangarap ko na lamang ngayon ay gumradweyt sa Ateneo kahit na hindi ako maging cumlaude/magnacumlaude/summacumlaude. Sapat na sa akin ang simpleng diploma na iaabot sa akin sa taong 2011.

A Series Of Unfortunate Events

Yeah. Yeah. Blah Blah Blah.

A lot of bad things kept on happening to me at this moment of my life!!

KFC and I are not allowed to see each other anytime we want to because of the distance and also because some people do not allow us.

When I received my math long test result, I saw that I got a 75.5 but then I recount it and it turned out I only got a 65.5.

So that is a 10-point decrease in my score.

We have a project in English and uhm--better not tell it.

My favorite checkered shoes was super wet with the dirty canal water yesterday because of the heavy rain.

My umbrella got broken and my file folder, too!

My papa stopped calling me.

I still don't get along with some of my blockmates and I didn't even get the chance to talk to some of them.

I'm missing kaloi so much but I don't want to keep on texting him or whatever because I don't want to disturb him during his study time or class hours.

Hay, I will trade all my chocolates, an ateneo-lasalle game or whatever just to spend a whole day with him.

A day without thinking about rules, school or things like that.

I want freedom from all the chains of my life.

Things that stop me from doing things which makes me happy.

Really happy.

I value my education.

I'm grateful for all the blessings God gave me but...

...despite all those things, there are still some things missing.

You can never really have everything you want.

And for every thing you get, there is a price to pay.

Thank you to the people who are always there for me...

Elaine, Brent, Grace, Anna Moreno, Aimee, Chrissie and Zzy.

A Letter

My Peter Parker/veggie pizza/heart<3,

I really want to see you eh pero some things/people just won't let us. I want to be with you before going back to Manila again tomorrow. I want to hug you before I leave or just whatever...see you or touch you. I hate myself. I can't hold back my tears. I was really happy kanina when I was with you. I'm going to miss you so much. I'll be back sa Manila na. I don't look forward to it unlike before na excited pa ako. I have to study hard para wala silang masabi. And ikaw rin ha? I know naman na we're both doing our best. I know wala na talaga tayo magagawa para magkita bukas pero I know na pagdating ko naman sa dorm andun si baby piggy na bigay mo. I just have to hug him at once because I know that baby piggy can comfort me. I love you, my KFC. Sorry nga pala wala pa tayong picture together. Next time na lang, alright? Ingat sa Baguio trip. We just have to see each other again. I love you. Argh! Tears kept on falling. I can't sleep. I love you so much. I'm sorry din if makulit ako sayo. I'm sorry din if I posted it here sa blogspot. I just don't know where to put it. I can't write naman a letter for you kasi hindi ko rin naman mabibigay. And this is super haba if itetext ko lang sayo. Let me know if nabasa mo na ito ha?


Again, I LOVE YOU ... <3

Go Ateneo!!!

Way to go, Ateneo!!

It was the first game of the Ateneo and La Salle held at the big dome!

Though I wasn't able to watch the game in Araneta, I am quite happy in the end.

It was a good game.

Most of the time, the score is tied.

The score is 80-77.

I watched the game on the big screen TV in the caf up.

I was with my blockmates and all the other Ateneans.

Everyone was cheering and yelling.

Yee!

I could feel the school spirit until now.

Everyone was so supportive.

Long and Tiu, in my opinion, is soo good at playing basketball.

I think I'm starting to fall "in-crush" kay Tiu. =P

Ooops. haha. Crush lang.

Oh well! Tiu has it all.

One description nga sa kanya is:

"Simply Tiu Good"

=D

yee!

He's a cute and rich student-athlete of the Ateneo.

He's popular, you probably know him.

Anyway, for the next blue eagle-green archer game, I will make sure na mapapanood ko na sa Araneta.

Go Ateneo! One BIG fight!

"THE" Game

Honestly, I feel bad. So bad.

The Ateneo-La Salle game will be on Thursday and they started releasing tickets today.

I heard rumors before that some people camp near the ticket booth just to be the first in line.

I just laughed at it when I heard it and didn't believe.

Today, my roommate and I went to school at around 7 am but my first class starts at 9:30 am.

I saw that the rumor is true!

People actually slept near the door of the covered courts just to be the first in line the next morning!!!

And it actually paid off because they got a good seat for the eagle-archer game.

Hmp.

My roommate and I waited in line until 9:30 am.

I asked my blockmate Brent to wait in line for me and get a ticket but he soon left.

So in the end, I don't have a ticket for the much awaited game of the UAAP 70th Season.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Keep Holding On...I'm Loving It!!! <3

I Chose To Be Blue...So Maybe That's The Reason Why I'm Sad

Today's the day I feel so alone.

I feel like everything is going wrong.

I have almost everything naman.

I'm studying in one of the best universities in the country, I have a supportive and caring family, I have good friends, and Karlo who means a lot to me just as I am to him.

Pero bakit parang nothing's going right.

Something is missing.

I'm not happy with my life.

Maybe I'm suffering from depression.

College is no joke.

College is hard.

If you don't work hard, you won't get anything.

If you work hard enough, you still won't get anything.

And if you work super hard, you only get a fraction of what you deserve.

Hardwork is really needed to survive in the Ateneo.

Ang hirap mag-adjust sa buhay college.

I'm doing my best to survive pero nahihirapan ako, gusto ko ng umiyak.

I feel so alone din.

I'm 5 hours away from home and 7 hours away from Karlo.

I miss my high school friends so much and my high school life, too!

I have high school friends din naman dito sa Manila pero hindi rin naman kami lagi nagkikita.

High school life is way too easy compared to my life right now.

I'm missing it.

If I survive a day in college, accomplishment na yun for me.

And now, I reminisce my old life and cry... trying to remember how much fun I had.

During high school, I can study and have fun at the same time.

Pero now, if you study...study lang. If fun naman, hindi mo masyado enjoy kasi iniisip mo pa rin yung mga schoolwork na dapat mong gawin.

I don't have a good foundation pa for my English and Math classes which makes it even harder for me.

In my old school, I'm one of the smart kids(modesty aside) pero now in my university, I'm one of the clueless students.

Minsan tuloy I wonder...bakit kaya ako pumasa ng Ateneo?

Parang it's impossible eh.

I'm sorry masyado ko yatang dinadown sarili ko.

Pero it's true eh.

Nahihirapan ako.

The transition from high school to college is never easy talaga.

Minsan naiisip ko, sana hindi na lang ako nag-ADMU para hindi mataas expectation nila sa akin.

Nakakahiyang maging drop out ng ateneo.

I will definitely disappoint the people around me if mangyari yun.

I'm studying hard naman eh.

It's just that parang kahit anong gawin ko kulang pa rin.

Dati, I want to graduate with latin honors sa ateneo.

Pero now, all I want is to graduate kahit walang makuhang honors dahil super nahihirapan ako.

Wala naman akong sinisisi sa nangyayari sa akin ngayon.

Maybe masayado lang ako naii-stress sa dami ng ginagawa at iniisip.

Sana sembreak na..

Nakaka-perfect rin naman ako ng quizzes, minsan one mistake. Pero may mga quizzes din ako na 2/5 at 4/10.

Those quizzes make me sad.

Anyway, makakabawi pa naman siguro ako.

I'll really do my best.

I don't want to switch universities.

I have to stay here.

I must stay here.

Though I know it's not going to be easy...God will take care of me.

stressed. depressed. tired.

will I survive?

Bitter Sweet Weekend

Yay!

It's my 70th post in Blogspot.

Oh well.

I haven't updated my blog for almost two weeks.

I go online everyday but I don't really have time to post an entry.

A lot of things happened lately, particularly last weekend.

I don't want to go into the details because it makes me sad I don't want to talk about it and it makes me so happy I want to keep it to myself.

I saw a lot of people I missed so much and I saw that one person I've been longing to see and spend time with.

Some people got mad at me for going there but some people were happy, too.

I want to thank Anna Moreno for everything.

That's all.

I will go to school in about an hour.

Good morning.

<3

The Greatest Birthday Presents Ever!

Two of my high school friends, Kimi and Cleo, plus two of my college friends, Anna and Grace, went out with me to Eastwood.

We had a lot of photo ops and also ate yummy ice cream.

I had so much fun with them last July 1 and tomorrow, July 8, we will be seeing each other again.

Just look at the pictures and see how much fun we had.

I love them.

Sexy me! nyahaha. Ang feeling ko talaga. =P

Cleo, Jusz and Kimi with a super duper cute dog.

Kimi and Cleo

July 2, that's my birthday. A lot of things happened.

My roommates and I (together with Anna) ate our dinner at Sandbox and also went to Red Ribbon to eat a slice of cake.

A lot of people greeted me.

Aside from my roommates, Butch was the first one to greet me a "happy birthday" at twelve midnight right on the dot.

My roommates and I waited for my birthday to come and they treated me for a midnight Mcdo snack.

I love them.

I also took a chance on love. It was the best thing that could ever happen to me on my 17th year on planet earth.

I never really thought something like this would happen.

At first, I didn't want to believe him but I still did.

I realized I shouldn't really look for any reason why he loves me.

Knowing that he does and I do is enough for us to be together.

I love Karlo Angelo Fernandez Camagay.

'Nuff said.

Chrissie and Jusz

He is MY KFC!

July 6,2007.

We just spent our friday night at Starbucks and took a lot of pictures once again.

Above: Grace and Chrissie

Jusz and Grace

Model ng Starbucks. nyahahaha =p

Ang Buhay Asul

This is an informal blog entry.

-Life is hard. I'm stressed out. I'm confused.
-I'm beginning to like my college life, though.
-I'm learning how to cope and survive in this big, bad and blue school.
-I'm trying to make as much friends as I can but I only have a few close friends.
-I love dinners. =P It's the most fun part of my day.
-We had the university cheer rally from three to five in the afternoon (or did it end up at six?)
-Elaine, AC and I had to leave early because we still had our math diagnostic test.
-I pray na sana pumasa ako sa diagnostic test. I don't want to be transferred to basic math. One basic subject is enough!
-Should I believe or should I not? Will it be a yes or a no?
-All I want is one thing for my birthday and I don't think I will have it.
-Lunches at Manang's with Elaine.
-Trike every morning. Long walks every after class.
-I'm still in regular Filipino. =P
-Room 407.
-Block r3.
-Soccer every monday and wednesday with Cara, Jas and Elaine.
-I'm sorry, I'm just in basic english.
-I need to improve my writing and reading skills.
-Am I nakakahiya?
-UAAP starts soon.
-What do I want?
-Piso?... Trike...? or Fried chicken...?
-I want the third one....ssh!

Home Sweet Home

I have been a university student for only 12 days (including Reg Day, Guidance Testing, OrSem and regular class days) and I am already stressed out!

We had diagnostic tests in English and Filipino and for English, I'm still in basic. The Filipino diagnostic test results will be released on Tuesday, I pray that I will be in regular Filipino.

Math diagnostic test will be on June 29, I think?

I also pray that I'll stay in Sir Teng's class in Math 11.

There are a lot of homeworks and projects given to us.

I didn't expect college life will be this hard.

But this is just my first year (and first sem) in the Ateneo and I can't seem to handle everything.

I sometimes think of giving up.

I'm actually scared of having a QPI less than 2 because once you hit the bottom, it's bye-bye Ateneo na.

And I don't want that to happen.

I'll try my very best and not give up.

I now live with the motto:

"If you ever think of giving up, think about why you held on for so long."

Atleast, I befriended a number of my blockmates na.

I'm starting to love my life in the university.

But I admit, it's kind of hard but I just have to deal with it.

I have close friends na.

They are:

Grace, Anna, and Aime.

We had the rec week last June 18-21,2007.

I signed-up for ACTM, Musmos, ACLC, and Loyola Mountaineers.

I'm not sure if I could be active in all those orgs but if I can't, I will be forced to give up one or two of those orgs.

Today is Faculty Day and I am in Calasiao right now.

My last class yesterday ended at 4:30 pm, I went back to my dorm first, fixed my things and headed to the bus terminal at once.

I arrived home at around 10:30 pm.

I brought my homeworks with me.

I'll be back in Q.C. on Sunday.

That's it for now, I'm kind of busy.

'Til next time!

Matteo's Girl

Who's Matteo?
It's Matteo Ricci. It's a building in the Ateneo that provides Ateneans a place to study.
It's air-conditioned, by the way.
It's the perfect place to study, sleep and look for cuties.
hahahaha.
It's where I hang out during my break time after eating my snacks/lunch.
Right now, I'm with Elaine Yeung, she's my blockmate.
Our next class will be PE at 3 pm and it's only 12:20 pm on the brown wall clock hanging on this room.
This week is RecWeek and I'm planning to join Musmos, ACLC, Guidon, Gawad Kalinga, YFC, ACTM, and a lot more.
It's still unofficial, though.
I have to limit myself and join just two or three.
We have to report in PE and I think I bought the wrong shin guards and it's too expensive pa!
I don't want to spend again to buy shin guards because I get to use it only for a sem.
Oh my!
I better choose the perfect PE next sem.

It's The First Day Of School, Y'know! =P

Hahahaha.

I'm sorry for the lame title.

Okay, first day of class went well.

I had Math 11 for my first class.

Ate Coreen accompanied me to my room.

She is a sophomore and she's really nice.

It's a good thing we didn't have a diagnostic test in Math because I hate math!

Math kills me!

Our prof is really nice.

He's Sir Timothy Teng.

I pray that I'll pass the diagnostic test in order for me to stay in Math 11 or else it's basic math for me.

Next class is basic english.

We had a test.

Part I and II plus the vocabulary was fine, what messed up my day was the essay part!

Wooh!

My mind is still on vacation.

Geez,

After English class, I went back to my dorm, ate my lunch and bought some stuff in National bookstore.

After that, I went back to the Ateneo, specifically in Matteo Ricci.

I transferred my notes in Math in another notebook and slept until 2 pm.

By 2:15 pm, I started walking and I was on my way to the cov courts.

When I got there, I don't know anyone, so I went back.

While I was walking, I saw Jas and her friend and we went to the cov courts together.

Elaine showed up a few minutes later.

We met our teacher and classmates in soccer, and we were given a topic that we have to report on Monday!

Shucks!

I don't know a thing about goal clearance.

That was the topic given to me.

And I have to buy a white PE shirt, black shorts, shin guards (is the spelling correct?), and knee-high socks.

Well, the first day of school was bearable naman.

I met new friends again, except for English class.

I'll have ES 10 and Filipino 11 tomorrow.

I hope tomorrow will be a better day and hopefully, I'll meet a lot of new friends.

For those people who had their first day of class today, I hope you had fun, too!

A New Life Begins Tomorrow

Classes start tomorrow.

Tomorrow will be the first day of the first semester of my first year in college.

Wow!

I can't believe I'm in college now.

Time flew waaaaaaay too fast!

I don't know how I feel.

Everything is different right now.

I live in a different place away from home.

I don't live with my family but instead I share a room with my dormmate/roommate, Grace.

She's from Baguio City, by the way.

I don't eat lutong bahay anymore.

I always eat outside.

Living in Katipunan doesn't leave you much choice but to eat chicken.

Most of the restaurants or fastfood chains found in Katips serve chicken.

Chicken, chicken, chicken!

Whether it be fried chicken, roasted chicken, chicken inasal---name it! I ate it!

In Katipunan, there is KFC, Max's, Chicken Bacolod, Kenny Rogers, Jollibee, Mcdo, etc.

Though, we also have Yellow Cab and Pizza Hut in Katips, I don't want to eat pizza for my lunch or dinner because I want rice.

Anyway, it's 8:55 pm on my clock.

I need to go now.

God bless to all of us.

Money, where are you?

I woke up at around 10:45 am.

I decided to eat my brunch.

I got up from my bed, fixed myself, got my wallet, put it in my bag and off i went to hunt for the perfect resto that will fill my tummy with yummy food.

As I walked along Katipunan, Chicken Bacolod caught my eye.

So, I decided to eat my brunch in there.

I sat down, ordered chicken inasal *yum**yum*, and waited for about ten minutes.

Finally, my order was served.

I had about five spoonfuls of that delicious chicken inasal when I realized that I don't have money in my wallet!!

Uh-oh!

I stopped eating. I thought of a way on how to get back to my dorm and get my money without letting the waiters or anyone know about it.

I thought of asking someone in my dorm to get my money for me but it was so embarassing.

I thought of another way.

I got up, told the cute waiter (honest! one of the waiters is cute!) that my mom's in my dorm and I need to go there for a while.

I told him I'll leave my phone and bag in order for them to be sure that I'll be back.

So, I left and ran back to my dorm.

hahahaha.

I got my money, and ran back to the resto.

Whew!

That was tiring and I was hungry more than ever.

I wolfed down my food, paid my bill, scribbled on the receipt that "ang cute naman po nung isang waiter niyo =P hahaha"(ask me why I did that...I also don't know the answer), and left at once.

hahaha.

Yuck, Justine!

Now, can you call that embarassing?

Soundcheck!!!

OrSem2007: Soundcheck!

The upperclassmen of the Ateneo welcomed the newest batch of students in the Loyola Schools, the Freshies.

They prepared a three-day orientation seminar filled with fun activities, helpful talks, and tiring tours.

The Orientation Seminar or OrSem as we call it is the best thing that could ever happen to a freshman.

This year's theme is Soundcheck.

Here is something that I copied from the OrSem letter:

Soundcheck is perfectly orchestrated to help you harmonize with the acoustics of the Ateneo community. Just like in an orchestra, each one of us has his own instrument. Each one plays different notes. When combined, these notes can form delightful symphonies that move our emotions and describe our own identity as Ateneans - as one big family.

We look forward to being part of this greatest concert in your life - college.


Honestly, for the first two days, I didn't enjoy much. It's not because the activities were boring. The activities were great but it's sad because I didn't make friends yet. For the third day, that's when I gained (a few) new friends.


On the first day...

When we arrived in the cov courts, we registered.

Then the OrSem started with a mass officiated by Fr. Nebres.

After the mass, we went to the Henry Lee Irwin Theatre for the Loyola Schools Presentation.

Some videos were shown and some talks were given then we went back to the cov courts to eat our lunch.

After eating lunch, we went to Faura and had our GDs or group dynamics.

We played some games. The first game was Pornstar game, I think.

And my pornstar name is "Potchie San Miguel".

hahaha.


On the second day...

We had the morning show. This is when the Blue Babble Battalion or BBB, performed and taught us the cheers of the Ateneo.

After that, we had our council tours.

Went to HLI Theatre again, watched the OrSem film made by the Loyola Film Circle.

Then followed by the organizational talks.

After that, we went back to the cov courts and ate lunch.

After lunch, we had some more GDs in the same location, in Faura.

For SOM students like me, we went back to HLI Theatre for our SOM Night.

The SOM night's theme/title is:

Atenista

Big Brother

seaSOM 5

Some alumni went there. The only person I remembered is Karylle. The other two, uhm---I forgot their names but the woman is a model and the man is a musician.


On the third day...

We had another morning show.

Followed by Course and Department Talks, this is when we get to learn more about our course and some alumni of this course told us what they do now.

Then we ate our lunch followed by a campus tour and then the OrSem night!

The best activity so far.

The bands who played:

Dicta License, Kjwan, Hale, Chicosci (this is love :P), and Spongecola.

We also had the OrSem Idol(one for singing and one for dancing) in which you can win an iPod video.

Our host for the OrSem Idol is Nikki Gil.

I love Miggy! I'm near the front stage pa!

Yikee!

Even if siksikan and people were sweating ( of course I couldn't do anything but bear with it), I just enjoyed the night.

I never missed an OrSem activity.

I will definitely join the OrCom next year.

I love the TnTs (this is the kind of TnT that will NOT explode, okay?).

They're crazy, fun and full of energy.

And when they say "MOB!", you better "MOB!!!" or else!!!!

hahahaha.

Funny TnTs but I love them expecially block R3's TnTs, Kuya Lui and Ate Peanuts.

Biased ba?

hahahaha.

Pero really, I love them... no doubt.

They danced on top of the monoblock chairs.

hahaha.

I love the Banana, Chuga, and the sexy Pacific Ring of Fire.


TnT means Talk and Tours, by the way.

Thank you TnTs and Logs, thank you OrCom, thank you upperclassmen, and thank you Ateneo for welcoming us in the university.

I really feel very happy because I am a part of your big family and you made us feel really special because the OrSem's well-prepared.

For our sponsors:

Tradeport.com, Figaro, Lipton, Hangten, P&G, Jollibee, MYX, and a lot more (sorry I forgot)...thank you so much!

I love Ateneo!!

Side note: I love Ateneo daw...pero pag classes na. I hate Ateneo na siguro dahil sa terror profs, harder subjects(aihy sh*t! math!) and a lot of projects.

Dapat talaga hindi ako maevict sa bahay ni kuya (ateneo).

Pictures:

The shirt of the person in front of me.

My OrSem name tag.

New found friends:

Maki(from Newton), Grace(my roommate) and me.

Kjwan!!!!

OrSem Idol

Hale

Wooh! The best ChicoSci!!! I love you! wahahaha.
Sayang talaga itong picture na ito. huhu.

Spongecola